Inappropriate Brah

Inappropriate Brah

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    76 Responses to Inappropriate Brah

    1. There’s only a fraction of a tit to be seen. A delicious fraction, but a fraction none the less.

      Ironically, it is not top heavy.

      This picture requires too much imagination.

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    2. @dieAntagonista: Physical abuse is not the same as rape either. Many women are threatened with death when they are raped which can be very tramatic.

      I agree that if shrinks are pushing certain ideas on rape victims that that is wrong. I do not see that happening here in the states. There are many different perspectives and approaches to dealing with rape and sexual abuse in general so there are many different methods of healing available.

      I have never talked to a therapist one on one about my experiences. It did not seem necessary. Some women do need that. I have never been to an online forum for anything of that nature. I don’t get along well enough with women generally speaking to willingly go to a place where they flock.

      As a teenager I volunteered in a group that went from school to school educating kids about a variety of subjects, rape was included in that. I was the only person on the team who was willing to sit on stage and speak to hundreds of kids candidly about rape (date rape specifically). The other girls were too emotional about their experiences. Talking about it and helping kids have a realistic view that might help them avoid being raped or deal better with the experience if it happened to them made the experience of being raped acceptable to me. I have never felt less of a person for it or ever felt that it was my fault. I do not feel stronger for it as I was already strong to begin with, I simply accept the experience as one of many burdens that come with being female.

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    3. @dieAntagonista: I want to add that I think that people are too delicate. We are sheltered from many realities. Just look at how many cultures deal with death. Death is something we should embrace but people are afraid of it. It’s idiotic.

      The same is true of how people respond to violence. People are so sheltered that they are incapable of responding logically or coping with extreme situations. It takes something really horrific that forces the survival instinct to kick in for people to be able to continue functioning. The American culture, and probably many others, are so padded that things like rape and physical abuse are things that break people at a fundamental level rather than making them stronger.

      I plan to be a therapist before I’m 40 and I will only take on clients who are willing take personal responsibility and learn to look at things realistically. Screw hiding behind things and whining about it.

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    4. @outofocus: @dieAntagonista: In general I agree w/ most of what you both say. One place I differ is the effect of rape for the very young. It does something to you and you may not realize what it is til much later. Then there’s the truly violent gang-style rape; again, not something you just walk away from. That’s not to say you don’t end up stronger for having been through it and come out the other side. How rape affects a woman is different for everyone of us. It depends on age, who the raper is, what his relationship to her is (if any) and of course the circumstances under which the rape is effected. Was there was nothing she could have done to avoid it or had she left herself stupidly vulnerable? Feeling guilty and stupid can only add to the already horrific experience. I understand what you’re both saying but I think a little empathy is in order for anyone who has to deal w/ being raped, regardless of well they’re handling it.

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    5. @nyokki: I agree. I’m pretty sure I expressed the empathy side though. That was what I was challenging dieA on.

      Abuse of any sort to the young has serious effects. It hard wires children to expect different norms than non-abused children. That’s why I think child abusers need a bullet to the head. The damage they do is HUGE.

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    6. @outofocus:
      Punching my cast would only further harm your own wrists. My wrist on the other hand, lays protected inside of the cast. *eviler grin*

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    7. Hah, she’s getting mad at the guy who didn’t do anything. He will get a slap or a broke nose or a knee to the crotch he doesn’t deserve.

      Jumping to conclusions is funny

      (sarcasm)

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    8. @outofocus: Somehow I don’t think you will be very successful as a therapist if you only take on clients who don’t need therapy.

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    9. how many women does it take to screw in a light bulb?

      3.

      1 to screw in the light bulb and the other 2 to suck my dick.

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    10. @sylvanish: If you judge success by level of income than you are probably right.

      Even people who have their heads screwed on straight need someone to talk to on occasion.

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    11. @outofocus: Hmm, yeah. I suppose that’s honestly probably the best mentality a therapist could have too. Good for you babe!

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    12. @outofocus:

      Of course, if they are threatened with death, they are technically ‘rape survivors’. But I obviously meant only those that just call all rape victims, rape survivors.

      Other than that I agree completely with everything you said. I guess it’s not everywhere the same, for example I have no idea what the situation is in America.
      Most non-European people think that people here are very open and have no problem talking about things like this in order to help others. The truth is, this is not the case. They’re very generalising and should one seek individual help because they got raped, chances are they will only be ignored.

      Like I said, it’s for every one different, but you make the impression of a very strong woman anyway it’s true. I wish I had the courage like you, to speak in front of a crowd of people about stuff like this. I’m not good at public speaking anyway, but to talk about such a touchy subject? My god. I’d probably break down or something.

      As for the cultures and death situation, I couldn’t agree more. That is so true.
      If people would be more aware that rape and murder are just around the corner, it would make people’s lives a lot easier. And the fact that people don’t dare to talk about things like that openly, and instead they just whisper about it behind closed doors gets me really angry as well.

      Honesty is key.

      And I find it really dope that you wanna be a therapist. I’m convinced you’d make a superb one.

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    13. @outofocus:

      Ow, to be honest I used the words death and murder interchangeably. :<
      Whoa, is that really true? I didn’t know that about the states. Just imagining it makes me cringe.

      And right on. Now that’s what I call determination. I like that mental picture you gave me, of strangers telling you their life stories.
      And yes, what does it matter if you will be 40? It’s going to be so worth it. One of my heroes said that your life will only actually start with 50.
      For me, it looks like I’m going to go to school for at least 8 more years. (I’m 19) And the only decent job I can get at the moment is to work as a waitress. Which I’m doing currently and it probably won’t change for a long time. But hey if I know that in the end I’m going to do something I love for the rest of my life?

      I’m really not good at complementing people, but I just can’t not say it. The more I learn about you the more I’m convinced that you’re one phenomenal person. Next time I feel tempted to act irrationally I’m gonna try to be a little more like you instead.

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    14. @dieAntagonista: I said death, not murder! :p haha!

      It wasn’t that long ago that in the states if a woman accused someone of raping her, a father, friend or stranger, that the blame would be placed on her… not just by the people around her but the courts.

      That has changed but there are still stigmas left over. That can be seen in many comments to this image.

      I’ve been the “therapist” to my friends since forever. Not intentional, it just happens. Strangers tell me their life stories. I had planned to slowly get my degrees and become a therapist when I was much older but now that my wrists are all messed up I can’t stay in the tech industry so my life plans have been adjusted. It will take me a long time to get degrees and certification (i have to pay rent and be a parent) so I won’t be a therapist probably until I’m 40. By then I should be patient enough for the less emotionally intelligent clients. πŸ˜‰

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    15. @dieAntagonista: *grin* Thanks. Although I have to admit that I’ve always wished I could be a little less in control and a little less rational. I never got to be a teen or crazy early 20’s type person. I’m more playful now in my 30s. heh.

      I wish I had been able to go to school when I was your age. I tried but I had no support, financial or otherwise. I’ve never been very good at managing work and school which is partially why I’m looking for a non-computer focused job right now because every tech job I’ve had has always asked more of me than was originally agreed and 60 hour work weeks do not bode well for studies.

      I plan to move out of California which I think will make schooling more affordable (and paying for rent). It is easier now that I’m over 25 and the state no longer expects parents to help pay for school. That always made me angry.

      As far as courts finding women at fault in rape cases. It is true. It was a mark of progress for feminists when that began to change. It was when I was a teenager that people began to be a little more open about abuse/rape but even now the religious crap in our culture makes rape victims feel ashamed.

      I think women should respond exactly as the woman in this picture appears to be responding. With righteous anger. The few times I’ve been to bars/clubs I see women there who will be friendly to men who are overwhelming them. They will look pleadingly to their friends to help them instead of saying “No”. This is a cultural issue that stems from outdated ideas about gender. Unfortunately it remains with men too because when a woman speaks out and says “No”, she is often called a “bitch”. I proudly wear the label. πŸ˜‰

      What are you going to school for? My long term plans are a PHD in psychology but I am going to get certified as a MFCC/MFT when I get my bachelors so that I can work and simply continue schooling.

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    16. @outofocus: “therapist to friends” I do know what that is like. Have joked in the past that I need to start charging them or wear the clerical collar….or Get the state liquor servers certification and become a bartender. As for leaving Ca, please give NM a thought. A hard charger with her head on straight, we need more of that out here.

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    17. as for the pic? took a bit of study, but sunglasses nor ballcap are at fault. The culprit is the guy behind the two women, head next to girl on right. got both hands full. I’m all for an unwanted grope being repaid with a nut punch, just please, make sure you get the right scrotum.

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    18. @outofocus: I, too, know all about the “therapist to friends”. It gets annoying sometimes. You watch your friends make the same stupid choices over and over again and end up crying in your lap. I will say however, that my best friend (w/ the worst taste in men, has seemingly finally learned her lesson. Break up w/ ’em have a 1/2 hour cry and move on.

      I loved college. So much so that I started in 1979 and didn’t stop until 1995. I just started collecting degrees. I hope you enjoy it as much.

      @dieAntagonista: What are you studying?

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    19. @SumoSnipe: I have learned over the years to be careful to set very clear, comfortable boundaries for myself (otherwise I absorb everything and then explode and severe ties). As I’ve gotten better at doing that, I have learned to take pleasure in seeing the positive effects of my advice put to use.

      It can be hard sometimes because I don’t have any one to talk to myself. I mean, my friends say they are happy to listen but it’s just not the same. I get annoyed when people give me obvious advice.

      As far as moving goes, Austin is my choice. My good friend, a female not too unlike me actually, just moved into your neck of the woods though. Rio Rancho specifically.

      @nyokki: I actually dumped a friend of over a decade because of this bad habit of choosing terrible girlfriends and expecting me to accept being out of the picture until there was trouble. I’d rather have no friends than have a bunch of one sided friendships.

      I love learning. I have been taking classes on and off since I was 16, I just never earned a degree because I took self interest courses (wood working is a good example). I couldn’t commit to a goal because I didn’t know how to make the system work for me. I am finally at a point where I can do so. πŸ™‚

      I must be heartless. I don’t cry after breakups. I celebrate.

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    20. @outofocus: Coincidentally, today is the 25th wedding anniversary for hubby and I, so I haven’t broken up w/ anyone in a very long time, and frankly, never as an adult.

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    21. @nyokki: Well, congrats. πŸ™‚ I sincerely hope that you are still happy. I think long relationships such as yours are amazing.

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    22. @outofocus: Oh yeah I’m a total freak. Compared to most I guess I’m pretty conservative (it’s all in the head you know) but I’m certain my crazy years will begin when I’m a little older as well. I cannot wait.

      Yeah it’s not easy, even here where we don’t have to pay outrageous amounts of money like you do, for school. I respect you Americans deeply for managing to go to school and pay all that money. My friend told me some horror stories about how hard it is, so I never dare to complain about my situation.
      I wish you all the best with whatever you are going to do.

      Yes, as for the club/ bar thing, it’s the same here. But again, there are many women (as far as I can tell) who enjoy when strangers just grab their asses and whatnot. I too prefer being called a bitch if that means that I get to keep my dignity.

      Oh yeah psychology, I would wanna study that just for fun because it’s such an amazingly interesting subject.

      Right now, I have to study Latin, and additionally I’m studying German and History. I planned to go to law school, but I had to find out that I need to study Latin first. I can speak Latin but they didn’t officially teach it at my old school so now I have to waste time with this bullshit. The school I originally tried to attend did have Latin classes but they didn’t accept me because I have no religion. Much to my dismay.

      @nyokki: Yea like I said I’m just trying to get into law school. After that I’m going to try to get some certificates in additional languages, specifically French and Japanese and all this should help me to get to work for the UN. It’s my big dream. I have to aunts who work for the UN so I’m trying to follow into their footsteps. Also, congratulations. But really, if I had a choice, I too would want to go to school all my life.

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    23. @dieAntagonista: Best of luck to you too. They (family) finally made me get a job so I started teaching and made decent money as an adjunct for CUNY, but I still took at least one course a semester. Once I left NY, my choices narrowed down to nil. One of the very few things I miss.

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